Here’s how one leader’s attempt to set boundaries for her team backfired.
Carol was prone to sending emails to her team members whenever an idea popped into her head, but she didn’t want her staff to think they had to do the same, so she sent this email to her team.
She even added a note as part of her email signature to indicate that she expected no replies out of work hours.
It worked, at first. People said they felt relieved they weren’t expected to reply whenever they saw Carol’s emails come through.
But as the number of Carol’s off-hours emails multiplied, her team members began to feel anxious about leaving her many emails unanswered, so they began to mirror her habit of replying (and even initiating) emails during off-hours.
Carol realized that her actions were speaking much louder than her words. She couldn’t break her habit of writing emails whenever a thought came to her, but she did start to defer delivery until work hours.
Where are boundaries most needed, especially for teams working across multiple locations and time zones? Do you have examples to share?
Boy, did this LinkedIn post of mine ever ignite a firestorm! People had a lot to say about setting, respecting and ignoring boundaries, especially on teams whose members don’t sit by side every day.
I don’t pretend to understand how or why certain posts go viral, but this one drew more than 360,000 views, hundreds of comments, and several reposts.
In this edition of Communique, I’m sharing a summary of the hundreds of thoughtful responses that gave me pause for thought. I hope they’ll do the same for you. Here’s a downloadable PDF with actual responses, including example, actions and ideas teams can take to set and respect clearer boundaries.
Why not use “schedule send?”
Readers chimed in with strong and sometimes conflicting opinions on managing off-hours email. Many applauded using “schedule send” to respect boundaries, especially when inspiration strikes after hours. They shared practical tweaks like staggering delivery times or batching messages into a single email to reduce inbox anxiety.
Many pointed out that with global teams, there are multiple windows of “working hours,” so deferring to a particular time won’t necessarily solve the problem of people receiving emails at odd hours.
Others warned that deferred emails can backfire, especially if several go out at once. Ten messages landing at 9 AM Monday can feel just as overwhelming as late-night pings.
The takeaway: Technology may help, but trust and thoughtful communication matter more. Leaders should align their habits with their words, balance their own work rhythms with their team’s wellbeing, and remember that most email really isn’t all urgent.
Capture ideas first, send later
Several respondents suggested capturing ideas as they arise but holding off sending until later. Scheduling emails for appropriate times, perhaps keeping a draft folder or handwritten notes, lets leaders preserve their thoughts without overwhelming others.
This approach means that urgent or high-priority messages can be timed strategically early in the week or aligned to team time zones, while less critical ideas can wait or even be rethought. Writing ideas down often reveals that some messages lose urgency or relevance by morning, preventing unnecessary noise.
The takeaway: Separating idea capture from message delivery respects others’ boundaries, reduces inbox chaos, and often improves the quality and timing of communication.
The importance of shared norms and clear expectations
Many emphasized the importance of shared norms to reduce confusion and stress around email. Clear ground rules, such as “emails don’t need instant replies,” “texts are for emergencies only,” or “turn off notifications off-duty,” can help teams set boundaries and protect work-life balance.
Some offered creative systems, like using priority codes, auto-rules, or targeted distribution lists to flag urgency; separating brainstorming and discussions into distinct threads; or coding emails as “need to know,” “nice to know,” or “ignore.” These tactics allow individuals to manage attention without feeling pressured and can help ensure that truly urgent emails are given priority attention.
The takeaway: Teams need explicit agreements, mutual accountability, and training to choose the right tools for the right tasks, especially when time zones, workloads, and communication styles vary widely.
Living in an always-on culture
Several respondents linked off-hours email to a broader “always on” culture. Leaders who send messages at all hours, whether for convenience or to signal dedication, can unintentionally normalize overwork and set unhealthy expectations, even if they claim otherwise.
Some noted that maintaining balance is a shared responsibility. Individuals must set personal boundaries, avoid “just checking” emails off-hours, and resist installing work apps on personal devices unless necessary. At the same time, genuine downtime is essential for performance and well-being, and leaders’ behavior powerfully shapes whether teams feel permitted to disconnect.
The takeaway: Just because others may be working at different hours than you, it doesn’t mean you have to follow suit.
What’s a leader to do?
Responses revealed a split on the leader’s role in modeling boundaries. Some argued Carol should have autonomy to work when it suits her, especially when her team spans multiple time zones. Her team should be able to trust her when she says she doesn’t expect replies during off-hours. They felt leaders shouldn’t be penalized for choosing their own work rhythms.
Others said they feel that leaders set the tone through their actions, especially if their words contradict those actions. Late-night emails, even with disclaimers, can signal unwarranted urgency, create pressure to overwork, and erode trust. Several noted that when a leader sends off-hours messages or works during their vacation, they’re normalizing these habits for the team.
Using tools like scheduled send, or batching non-urgent communication, was seen as a better way to balance flexibility with modeling healthy practices.
The takeaway: Leadership behavior speaks louder than words or policies. Thoughtful, consistent modeling of boundaries builds trust and helps teams avoid burnout.
Considering the recipient’s perspective
Many highlighted how after-hours emails can feel overwhelming to employees, even when no immediate response is required. Weekend “idea dumps” or late-night messages can create Monday backlogs, wasted effort on outdated or irrelevant thoughts, or pressure to “get ahead” just to cope, especially for understaffed teams or those anxious about a constantly jammed-up inbox.
Some felt that employees should take responsibility for their own actions.
Flexible work schedules often mean that people send emails at odd hours, while others feel strongly about disconnecting outside of work hours. If there’s a high degree of trust between the leader and team members, some said, it’s easier to respect and uphold boundaries.
The takeaway: Unfiltered off-hours communication can erode focus and trust. Thoughtful timing, clear reinforcement of expectations, and self-awareness about what truly needs to be sent all help prevent unnecessary stress and distraction.
The complexity of multiple time zones
Working across multiple time zones is unavoidable for global teams, and it complicates email etiquette. Several respondents noted the need for clear norms or response metrics to balance flexibility with accountability, though overly rigid rules can backfire.
Some argued it’s unrealistic, and perhaps unfair, to expect all communication to fit one person’s work hours. Others shared examples where thoughtful managers acknowledged time differences, easing pressure even when emails arrived outside local hours. Yet many admitted they still check messages off-hours, underscoring the pull of constant connectivity.
The takeaway: Global collaboration requires explicit agreements, mutual respect for differing schedules, and intentional habits to prevent overload while maintaining responsiveness.
Balancing flexibility and autonomy with consistency and predictability
Several people highlighted the value of adaptability over rigid rules. For example, a leader who takes a late-night call to support a teammate or responds to an important message outside of typical work hours can build trust and psychological safety when used intentionally.
Respondents stressed that context matters. Sharing work patterns and hours with colleagues (e.g., making up hours after childcare) can normalize different schedules without creating pressure.
The takeaway: The key isn’t strict boundaries or constant availability, but thoughtful choices that balance personal needs, team well-being, and responsiveness across time zones.
Moving away from email
A few said they’d like to decrease reliance on the use of email altogether in favor of using some kind of online asynchronous area where team members can provide feedback in a structured way that both protects work/life balance and reinforces clear prioritization, without causing the team undue anxiety.
Said one: “I don’t like/trust email for continuous updates, and I’d much rather have everything in one place rather than scattered across multiple email chains that I can’t even guarantee everyone will read.”
In sum
After reflecting on the hundreds of responses I sifted through, a few central themes emerged: Consider your recipients’ likely reactions before sending off-hours emails. Be intentional about the timing, content and relative sense of urgency. Create explicit norms and standards about the use of email within the team. Set clear boundaries, with the leader modeling this behavior for others. Technology (e.g. “schedule send”) is no replacement for being deliberate and thoughtful when it comes to creating and sending email.
Links
Downloadable resources from Guided Insights:
Summary of actual comments and ideas, excerpted from hundreds of comments in response to my post
Principles Guidelines and Worksheet – best completed with at least one other team member
Past Communiques:
- Galvanize global virtual teams with clear operating principles
- Ten must-know email tips for teams to make an impact and get results
- Practical Steps for Creating a Team Communications Map that Everyone Embraces
- Want to Accelerate Your Remote Team’s Project? Create a Communications Ecosystem!
External links:
